www.jeffthefish.com

I can’t believe how quickly these keep rolling in! It was only two weeks ago that I published the last edition of HCQ. If you’ve found any funny Creationist quotes, send them to me!

If the origins of life all did happen by random mutation, he questioned, where does the laws that make the universe possible to function – the law of gravity, the law of thermodaynamics, laws of motion – all come from? [Source]

If a finch gave birth to a elephant, then you would have evidence for evolution. Yet when finches stay finches, bacteria stay bacteria, adaptations are no proof EVOLUTION. How ignorant is the argument of evolutionists I have often heard - offensive lineman, look how big they are! As if a bigger human proves a human once was a moose, it does not! [Source]

The Cambrian Explosion shows virtually all creatures that exist today existed at the very start of creation consistent with the Genesis record. [Source]

Yeah, and I recall when it was proven Bumble Bee’s couldn’t fly. [Source]

You people are all very ignerant. If evlution is true then why arent their more transisional fossils and why are their so many gaps in the fossil record? You can make fun of us all you want but you can’t explain how we got here from rocks. [Source]

Hey now that monkey could be my great great great great great times 1billion to the second power uncle your talking about. Don’t make me get a lawyer. Thats what atheists expect us to believe than they insult our intellegence? hmmmmmmmmm [Source]

It is so sad that millions of dollars are being spent on researching the universe, but the underlying philosophy is often that scientists want to find answers to how life arose…[Source]

There on many books in favor of creation. Different books concentrate on different aspects of the creation/evolution debate. [Source]

The building below, located in Mexico, is owned by friends of Ken “Willful Ignorance” Ham, and according to his website it was built to be “approximately the length and height of Noah’s Ark. It is twice the width of the Ark.”

Now why would they have to build it twice the width of Noah’s Ark? Maybe because a space the size of the Ark is too small to run their business, let alone house two of every animal on earth? Yeah, mayberz.

I mean, look at that thing. Now imagine filling it with 2 of every unclean animal and 7 of every clean animal. I bet you’re finished already!

So the water company that services my area, , charges you $3 if you pay your water bill online. For comparison, their late fee is $5. Why am I getting penalized for using their website?

I sent them this email:

I’ve mentioned this before, but the $3 fee for paying online is unacceptable. I work in the ecommerce industry, and I know first hand that this is unnecessary. It’s either an artificial fee that exists for no purpose other than making Minol more money, or an artifact of an archaic system. My guess is the former. If I had a choice of provider, I would switch in an instant for this reason alone. It does not cost you $3 more to process an online fee than a check, and if it does, you need to get a new system. This is 2008.

If they send me a response, I’ll post it here. Last time I complained they gave me a pretty lame excuse, but I don’t know what it was. I’m thinking of complaining every month.

URGENT MINOL UPDATE!!! 

I just recieved this very excellent response!

Good afternoon Jason,

I agree 100%, however we do not process over the phone/web payments through our system.  We outsource that processing to authorize.net.  There is a fee for this service, and is passed along to the resident.  We are working to improve our in-house systems, and apologize for the inconvenience of a processing fee.  I would rather send my check to avoid the fees.  The other option would be to utilize online bill pay with your banking institution, as they would draft your account, then process a check to be mailed just as you would.

We appreciate your feedback.

This is not the response I was expecting.  They did not give an excuse, but rather agreed with me that there was a problem, explained the reason, and assured me that they were working to improve the situation.  I think that’s the best response you can get from a utility company.

Amen.

Just have to let everyone know!  The tiger represents math!  The crocodile represents Noah’s Ark!

Let’s all work together to make “A vs. B. A kills B (A Wins)” and “anyone should know that” the latest internet memes ever!

On Sunday I had my appointment with the homeopath. It wasn’t quite what I expected, but I really didn’t know what to expect. Out of respect I will not give his name. I will instead refer to him as Dr. Homey O’Path.

I spent an hour and a half there, mostly talking about myself, which I love to do. He wanted to know not only about the condition I wanted to try to treat, but a lot of things about my life and history: whether I got made fun of school, how my sinus infection makes me feel, what my interests are, etc. Ambulocetus even made it into the conversation, which pleases me.

Then he explained to me that his job now was to examine the notes he’d taken and decide what the best course of action would be. He showed me his software that would allow him to enter symptoms and return a list of suggested preparations, with extensive cross-referencing. I have to admit, I had a difficult time not chuckling when I saw that one of the symptoms was “Abandonment”, and that it was cross-referenced with “Forsaken”. There are actually homeopathic preparations for feelings of abandonment. I’d hate to be the guy that gets misdiagnosed as feeling abandoned when what he really needs is forsakenness medicine. But I digress.

So where do we go from here? In the next couple of days, Dr. O’Path will send me a homeopathic preparation, and I will take it and see how it goes. After that I may go back for a follow up. I have no expectations that this will work, and I made sure that Dr. O’Path knows this.

Overall, the appointment was a positive experience, mostly because I love talking about myself. And he had a small pot on his desk containing several cacti in Tahitian moon sand with a lamp directly over it. I like that kind of thing.