www.jeffthefish.com

I’ve been collecting these for the past couple of months. They pretty much speak for themselves. Some might be funnier in their original context, so just click the source link following each quote. If you need help understanding why they’re funny, let me know. And I’m not doing this specifically to ridicule anyone or be mean. I just want to point out how these people are giving Christianity a bad name and making the world a worse place.

Andrewsarchus is a terrifying wolf–like creature, with a large head and fierce teeth. All these details from one skull! (Source)

‘If adults want to believe in a 6,000-year-old Earth, that dinosaurs and humans lived together in harmony (all dinosaurs were vegetarians, you see) and that Noah saved all of the Earth’s animal species by placing them on his ark, then they have the right to do so.’

He needs to read the Bible. Noah did not save “all of the Earth’s animals species.” God sent TO Noah representatives of each LAND ANIMAL KIND. When one sees such incorrect information in a piece by a scientist, one has to worry whether the same lack of attention to accuracy is exhibited in his own research, or the research he supervises! (Source)

Other famous living fossils include the tuatara (supposedly extinct since the Cretaceous Period until found still living in New Zealand), the Lepidocaris crustacean (only found as fossils in Devonian rocks), the Metasequoia conifer tree (thought extinct for the past 20 million years), the Neopilina mollusk (supposedly extinct for 280 million years), the lingula brachiopod (”extinct” since the Ordovician), and even the trilobite (chief index fossil of the even more ancient Cambrian Period).^(Source)

Understanding what advocates of intelligent design are saying is a necessary prelude to a thoughtful critique, which Mr. Johnson has not yet offered. (Source)

As I looked at this beautiful event, I thought of those that often ask me why God created the sun on the fourth day of Creation. When I answer this, I say something like, “God knew that humans in their sinful state would want to worship the sun (remember the warnings to the Israelites not to worship the sun like the pagans) instead of worshipping the God who made the sun. So God made the earth first, and plant life, before he made the sun—the sun is his tool. Also, God knew that in the 20th and 21st centuries, sinful man would propose ideas like the BIG BANG that teach people the sun came BEFORE the earth—but God created the earth before the sun. (Source)

I’ve had a lot of stuff crammed down my throat that didn’t go down to [sic] well. It seems like the critics of Christiianity [sic] like to beat we [sic] Christians up and say we are not literate in science and technology. (Source)

Although a dog could possibly mate with a cat, science knows that it is not possible for conception to occur. So I am at a loss as to how we have so many different species. (Source)

Yet none of these curious fish are considered by evolutionists to be ancestors of tetrapods—they are simply interesting and specialized fish. In fact there are even “flying fish” (with specialized fins that permit them to fly or glide in the air for hundreds of yards over water), but evolutionists have never considered them to be ancestors of birds. (Source)

It doesn’t take a “Rocket Scientist” to figure out that if we, as humans, evolved from monkeys . . . THEN WHY? . . . Are there STILL Monkeys??? We were “Created” by God!!! Pull up AOL now and you’ll notice the Gov. of Georgia praying for rain, (No Doubt to GOD). When 9/11 happened what did every good neighbor do? PRAY. Not to monkeys . . . To our “Creator”!!! It shouldn’t take tragic and desperate circumstances for people to realize this fact!!! GOD BLESS AMERICA!!! In GOD We Trust!!! (Source)

Stumble it!

Posted on Thursday, January 3rd, 2008 in Category Evolution, Hilarious Creationist Quotes. Please comment, ok?